


Always You

by JohnDoe221B



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Boys In Love, Canon Compliant, Concerned Harry, Getting Back Together, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Break Up, Stuck in a Lift, a little fluff, and I'm a Louis girl...so this is mostly Louis POV, depending where you are from, getting it right, i like drama...sue me, or elevator
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-10
Updated: 2017-03-10
Packaged: 2018-10-02 07:42:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10212785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JohnDoe221B/pseuds/JohnDoe221B
Summary: “Lou? What are you doing here?”  Louis shivered. The deep voice ran through every bone of his body. Of course, of all people he had to be here. Why was the universe hating him so much? What did he do in his previous life to deserve this? Louis looked up and gave his best try to fake a smile, until he remember who was standing in front of him. The corners of his mouth dropped and he nodded slightly, almost apologetic. No need to fake around Harry Styles, he would look right through it, anyways.ORThe one in which Louis and Harry get stuck in an elevator. Both men want to tell the other so much, but sometimes it is harder than you think to find the right words. Life is not a movie, but maybe they will have the happy end they deserve.





	

**Author's Note:**

> As always thanks to my lovely beta [pinky_heaven19](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinky_heaven19/)

Louis sighed, he hated this kind of meetings with management. It was always the same. _Do this, but don’t do that! And for god‘s sake, stop acting like yourself. All in all, just be someone completely different. That is the only way for you to sell records._

He had enough.

He tried to ignore the dull feeling in his stomach. After the boys and him finally were able to leave Modest behind, Louis had sworn to himself to never let something like this happen again. But here he was; standing in front of the lift on the third floor of yet another management firm that told him to hide behind a made up image.

Though he knew that it wasn't going to be the same, Louis hated the fact that he still wasn’t allowed to be just Louis fucking Tomlinson. A flamboyant, outgoing, sassy, creative, kind, loud _and_ gay young man. A man that loved music and wanted to show the world what he was capable of. Sure it was scary to be on his own, but Louis was ready. The feeling of wanting nothing more than to just move on and don’t look back became more and more overwhelming every day. Too many things had happened. Too many fights, he kept replaying in his head, wishing he would have reacted differently. Or reacted at all. He shook his head. There was nothing he could do about it now.

And still, he couldn't shake off the strange feeling in him. From time to time he felt so sick and tired, that all he wanted to do was stay in bed and do absolutely nothing. A privilege he didn't have at the moment. He needed to be out there. Apparently people had to be reminded that he still existed. Well, at least the version of him _they_ created. So he found himself more often than not in a club, with too many people and way too much alcohol. At first, Louis enjoyed the partying, but a man can only have so much fun without it getting stale like a beer you leave standing somewhere for too long. 

The doors of the lift opened with a noisy bing and Louis stepped inside, not looking up, even though he could see a silhouette standing in the left hand corner. He wanted to disappear and not interact with the world around him. 

“Lou? What are you doing here?”  Louis shivered. The deep voice ran through every bone of his body. Of course, of all people _he_ had to be here. Why was the universe hating him so much? What did he do in his previous life to deserve this? Louis looked up and gave his best try to fake a smile, until he remember who was standing in front of him. The corners of his mouth dropped and he nodded slightly, almost apologetic. No need to fake around Harry Styles, he would look right through it, anyways.  

“I had an appointment with my new management team, what are you doing here?” It was almost funny how much effort it took Louis for his voice not to crack. Harry always had this effect on him. Strangely unsettling but comforting at the same time. A mix that never boated well with Louis. He tended to make a fool out of himself whenever the younger boy was around. There was a time in which Louis didn’t mind whatsoever. He just didn't need yet another thing to make him question his pathetic existence, right now.

“Jeff has his office here. I was going to meet him for lunch and, well I’m a little early, so I thought I’d pick him up. I think you made a good choice, Louis. Jeff and his team are great and it will be so much easier now.”

It took all his willpower to not roll his eyes, but Louis managed. He even gave Harry a  small, almost honest smile. He only meant well, Louis knew that. But Harry sometimes failed to see that not everyone was a born rockstar and not everyone was loved by the brought messes like he was.

“So, which floor are you going?” Louis finally asked, looking Harry in the eyes for the first time. He looked tired, Louis noted. Something he regretted immediately. The effect this man had on Louis was unbelievable. He worried about him, even though there probably was absolutely nothing to worry about. He wanted to take Harry into his arms and tell him that everything was going to be fine. Just because he looked a little tired. What kind of a sick joke was this? Why was his brain working like that?

“Sixth floor. Thank you.” Louis pressed the button, ignoring the fact that he needed to get down in order to leave this dreadful building. As always, he was more than happy to serve Harry Styles.

Louis wanted to slap himself for his inner bitterness. There was no reason to be mad at Harry. Their breakup was a mutual decision, for the benefit of everyone, including the band and the other boys. There was no big fight, no screaming and no hate. They were better off as friends. That’s what it was. Pure and simple.

“Stop biting your nails, Louis. You are already bleeding. “ Suddenly he felt two big strong hands on his own. The nail biting had started a few month after One Direction was formed and it never really stopped. It help Louis to suppress certain feelings. It had become such a regular habit, that he didn’t even realize it anymore. He looked down at his and Harry’s hands. The younger man was right, the tip of Louis’ left index finger was already covered in blood and saliva.

Louis just pulled away his hands when the lift came to a hold. Finally, this was going to end. He could go home and spend the next hours hidden in his bedroom with closed blinds and loud music.

“Louis? I think something is wrong. The door won’t open. And according to the dial, we are in between two floors.” Harry pointed to the old fashion indicator above the lift doors. And indeed, it was stuck between five and six. Louis groaned. This was not true, was it? He looked around, trying to avoid Harry's gaze. As soon as he spotted the small help button next to the doors, he was relieved. They only needed to alert the staff and they would send someone to free them. No need to panic. 

“Hello? Somebody there? We are stuck in the lift, can you send someone?” Silence filled the room and Louis saw the concern in Harry’s eyes. God, why does he still look like the sixteen year old boy he was when they met? Louis pushed the button again.

“Hello?”

“Hello? Can you hear me now?” Louis smiled. “Yeah! Yeah we can hear you. We are stuck.”

“I’m sorry, Mister. But there is a problem with the electronics. We had a power cut and it seems like it messed with the lift system.” Louis shook his head. What kind of bullshit was that?

“If there is no power, why are we able to talk?”

“The power came back after a few seconds, but the lift system seems to have a problem rebooting. We already called the lift company, they should be here in less than an hour. I’m so sorry for your inconvenience.”

Louis sighned. This was not the right day to be stuck in a lift, after a dreadfully annoying meeting. And on top of this, he was with Harry. Sure, there were times in which that would be a dream come true for both of them, but right now, it was just

Well, Louis didn’t even know what it was. He looked at Harry again. He still stared at him like a small child  that lost his parents in Disneyland. Louis shrugged his shoulders. “Sorry, mate.” Harry smiled back. A fake smile. One of those he gave every interviewer who asked what they looked for in a girl. Louis hated to see that expression again. It has been a while and he was hoping to not see it ever again.

“Not your fault, Lou. Let’s get comfortable. There is nothing we can do, innit?” With that Harry sat down in the left corner. Louis was unsure what to do. He looked down at his ex boyfriend who gave him another fake smile. For some reason Louis couldn’t stand the thought of sitting right next to him so he chose the opposite corner. He sat down and stretched his legs. Suddenly every muscle started to hurt. Closing his eyes, Louis let his head fall back against the cool metal wall.

“Are you okay?” God, why has this voice such a deep impact on him? Louis felt guilty. The whole situation wasn’t Harry’s fault either, so he better stop acting like a pettish baby.

He gave his best to look Harry directly into the eyes. “Yeah, sorry mate. Didn’t have the best day and this is not making it better.”

“I see. Wanna talk about it?” Louis wanted to scream, but stopped himself. Harry only meant well, like always. He kept telling himself that. It was true, he knew it, but sometimes listening to your rational side was hard, and Louis wanted nothing more than to give into his impulsive nature and tell Harry how much he hated being here with him and how much he envied him for being...well, for being Harry.  

“No, thanks. I’m just being dramatic, you know how I can get when I’m in one of those moods.”  Lying to Harry was pointless, they knew each other too well, but he hoped the younger man got the hint and wouldn’t dig any further.

It worked, Harry remained silent, looking down at his hands. Great, now Louis felt guilt. Again. It hasn’t even been 20 minutes and Louis wanted to change his whole being just to satisfy the man in the opposite corner of this stupid lift. He slowly got up and walked the three steps over to him. Sitting down again next to him, Louis took Harry’s hand and smiled. An honest smile this time. “Sorry, mate. I know how much you hate it to see me like this and I love you for it, but there is nothing you, or I for that matter, can do about it.”

“Louis, stop calling me mate.” Harry pulled his hand away and started fiddling with his rings.  Louis wanted to punch himself. Why was it so hard for him to find a way to act around Harry? He didn’t want to be too affectionate, but on the other hand not too distant. They had shared so much for so long with each other. Of course, calling him mate opened old wounds. For both of them. Calling the person you love and share a bed with _mate_ or _lad_ usually left a bitter taste in their mouths. But that was what they had to do. And that was also the reason they didn’t make it. Well, one of the reasons. Louis knew, that not only management and the media were to blame. Louis and Harry had been part of this as well. They could have made it through it, just like they always promised each other. Though life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.

“I’m sorry, Harry. You are right.”  Both men took a deep breath. Looking at each other, they laughed a little. This was ridiculous. “At some point in our relationship we would be all over each other by now.” Harry stated. There was no sad undertone and Louis smiled wider. He remembered that time. It wasn’t even only at the beginning. They never really left the honeymoon phase. Somehow it always felt right to jump each other‘s bones. At any time and in any place. Louis couldn't even count anymore how many times one of the other boys caught them with their pants down. At the end it wasn’t even embarrassing anymore. For none of them. Even Liam stopped complaining.

“Do you remember that time during that German show, when I was blowing you and Paul came in? I will never forget his face of resignation.” Louis burst out into laughter. How much he wished back then to have a camera with him. He had never seen such a look on anyone. Paul was like a father for them, but he also knew when to just let them be and this was one of those moments. He told them to get ready and then left, shaking his head.

“One of many great memories.” Harry said quietly. Louis could only agree. He was still taken aback, when he thought of how fast and hard he fell for the 16 year old, curly haired boy with a smile too wide and innocent for his own good.

“You were so young. I sometimes wish we would have met later in life. Maybe then we would have had a chance.” Louis regretted his words even before he finished them. Harry hated it when he brought up his age. Or the fact that they were both so young when they met.

“Do you really think it would have changed a thing, Lou?” It was an honest question, no sign of bitterness. If Louis didn’t know it better, he would even think to hear a bit of hope in Harry’s soft voice.

“ ‘Don’t know. Maybe.” He shrugged his shoulders. “I think, if we both were a little more mature it would have been easier to handle all the shit they threw at us.” This time it was Harry’s turn to grab Louis‘ hand. Their fingers entwined with ease. Like they were meant to be one thing instead of two. It felt oh so amazing. And fucking scary. Louis couldn't stand it. He pulled away, knowing very well how it would hurt Harry. He wanted to be near him. It was almost unbearable, but Louis knew he couldn’t risk it. He was healing. His heart was far from being mended, but it was on a good way. He had accepted that they _couldn’t be_ , so he needed to learn how to be around Harry without feeling like shit each and every day.

Harry didn’t move a muscle. He was hurt, and Louis hated himself for that. “Sorry, but I can’t” he whispered, not sure if Harry even heard him.  Both men sat in silence. There was nothing to say, so why force something when it will only lead to more discomfort.

Louis looked at his phone. It must have been at least an hour, so why haven't they heard anything yet? He got up and pressed the help button again.

“Hello?”

“Oh, hello, sir. I’m sorry, but there seems to be a bigger problem with the system. We were trying to reach you, but it only works when you press the button in there. Are you okay?” Louis‘ mouth fell open. Now he knew, he was dreaming. Even his reality wouldn't be that cruel. He closed his eyes and waited. Maybe he could bring himself to wake up.

“Yes, we are okay.” He heard Harry talking next to him. So, no dream. Too bad.

“Can you tell us how long we are going to be stuck here?” He sounded calm, but he wasn’t, Louis knew that. He was impressed.

“No Sir, I’m sorry.” Wow that guy wasn’t a man of many words.

“That’s okay. What's your name?” Leave it to Harry to make a friend in a situation like this.

“Kevin, Sir.”

“Kevin. Hi, nice to meet you. I’m Harry and the other gentleman here with me is Louis. You have a nice voice, Kevin.”

God,what was he doing? Louis was beyond annoyed by now.

“Hello, nice to meet you, too.” Harry smiled, Louis knew that this was just the way he was. And he meant everything he said, but why now? For fucks sake. Maybe it would help to be a little firmer with _Kevin_. Put him under a little pressure so that he acted faster. Or at least made the lift guy work faster.

“Listen, Kevin, we are going to sit down again and come back in,let’s say, an hour to hear what kind of progress we are making. Is that okay?”

“That sounds perfect. We are working as hard as we can.”

Louis had enough. He pushed Harry slightly away, so that he let go of the button. He looked at him for a moment. He wanted to apologize, but his rage was overtaking his brain. So instead he pressed the button himself.

“Kevin, what would you do if I told you that one of us had a heart attack at this exact moment?” He tried to sound as stern as possible, but he wasn't able to hide the mocking in his tone. He could see Harry’s shocked face in the corner of his eyes, but ignored it.

Kevin’s answer came with a mild delay. “We are working as fast as we can. I will call an ambulance immediately, so that medical attention can be provided as soon as-”

“That won't be necessary, Kevin. I’m sorry for that. Louis was just joking. Please continue with your work and we will either see each other soon or we will contact you in an hour.”

Without waiting for an answer, Harry again let go of the button, he had taken over the control right after Louis had finished his stupid attempt of pressuring that poor guy.

“Was that really necessary, Lou? Did you honestly think that would speed up the process. Did you hear how terrified he was? I hope you feel good about yourself now. You scared an innocent bloke who is trying to rescue your sorry arse.”

Looking at Harry, who walked furious up and down the small space of the lift, made Louis even angrier. Of course it wouldn’t help, but being disgustingly nice didn’t help either, so what was the point?

“Right, mister perfect.” He murmured, trying to calm down. Though, nothing seemed to work. Suddenly there as so much energy in him. He turned to face one of the walls and took a swing with his left hand. Before his knuckles hid the wall, he felt Harry stopping his arm in mid movement.

“You will break your fucking hand. You fucking idiot.” Harry growled and Louis was so taken aback that he let himself fall onto the ground, now sitting crossed leg in the middle of their cramped space. He looked up at Harry with wide eyes and open mouth. Seeing Harry angry, was a very rare thing and Louis had no idea how to react.

Harry slowly sat down again on his old spot. Only a few feet away from Louis. Both men looked at each other. “Talk to me, Lou. Please. Talk.”

“What do you want to hear?” He said, lowering his gaze to the ground.

“This is not about what I want to hear and you know it. Talk to me.Tell me what really is going on in that head of yours. For fucks sake, Lou, be honest with me.”

Louis shook his head, still not looking up. Tears formed in his eyes. He wanted to tell Harry so many things, but he was sure it was too late. He missed his chance to be with him. To have him all to himself.

A big part of him wanted to tell him that. He wanted to bawl out how much he wanted him back, but it would only make him more vulnerable.

“Good, if you don’t want to talk, then I will and you have to listen.” This was a new tone. Louis knew that Harry could be stern and that he was not the young pure boy he was six years ago. He grew up. And he had to endure enough shit to develop some kind of feistiness.

“Do you remember how we used to hide under the bunk beds in the x-factor house and how Liam was furious with us when we-”

Harry kept going. His voice light and soft. He told all kinds of stories about their adventures. How they played pranks on the other boys, how they ran around their concert venues, during soundchecks, only to have a little snog behind some equipment trucks. How they always shared their food in restaurants. How they tried to touch each other in interviews without anyone noticing. And so on and so on.

It was painful to listen to, but Louis couldn’t stop smiling. The way Harry told these stories made him feel calm and happy. From time to time he looked into Harry’s eyes. They were full of love and Louis wanted to get lost in them.

“I miss you.” He said, in a moment Harry had stopped talking to take a deep breath, after laughing about his own stupid knock knock jokes.

“I’m right here.” He answered plainly.

“That’s not what I mean, idiot. I miss us. You and me. Louis and Harry. Lou and Haz. I want it back, but I have no idea what to do. This is not a freaking TV drama show in which a day locked up somewhere will bring the two protagonists back together. That is not how life works. Especially not ours. I wish it was and it sure feels often like a bad soap opera to me, but it’s not. It’s real and it sucks.”

“I agree. Lou, I want-”

Louis turned around when he heard the door behind him open. He could see a man looking down at them with a smile.

“I’m sorry, gentlemen, but the lift system is a lot more stubborn than expected. That’s why we had to break open the doors and you will have to climb up to me a little. Don’t worry, we will help you.” Louis sighed in relief. As much as he wanted to hear what Harry had to say, the prospect of freedom was more overwhelming than anything else. The air was so thick, both literally and metaphorically. Louis had trouble breathing. 

It only took them a couple minutes to climb out of the lift. The first thing Louis saw was Jeff and his stomach tighten into a big knot. Well, there it went, his chance of a _something_ with Harry. Naturally he would be here, but it still felt like someone had punched him. Louis looked around a little lost. He had no idea what he was supposed to do now. Just leave? Or should he wait until Harry had talked to each and every person present?

He watched both men from a slight distance, though not far enough to not eavesdrop their conversation. “God Harry, I'm sorry. I hope you are okay.” Jeff only spared Louis a quick look, before concentration on Harry again.

“Sorry Jeff, but me and Louis just spent quite some time locked up. We really need a bathroom right now.”

“ Of course. You know the way.”

Louis felt Harry’s hand around his wrist and before he knew they entered a fancy looking restroom. Harry looked around, to make sure they were alone. As soon as he was convinced that it was just them, Harry took a step forward, cupping Louis’ face with both hands. 

“You are right, this is not a soap opera, or TV drama and we are not going to go back to our old selves, but I promise you here and now I will fight for you! Louis I miss you as well. I want to be yours again. I want to be always yours. “ Louis took a deep breath. His heart was racing and he wanted to say something very clever. Instead he went for the cheesiest thing in their combined history. Though, no one of them would ever complain about it.

“You are! You always have been and you always will.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> [My tumblr. If you want, say Hi to me! ](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/greenmeetsblue221b/)
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> I’m sure no one reads the notes, but I wanted to say a few things:
> 
> I believe in Larry, but I also like drama. I kept imagining how a meeting after their break up would go. It felt wrong to just let them be back together in an instead though, so I thought I might give them a bit of a bittersweet ending. 
> 
> A little hope, but with the knowledge that they will have to work very hard if they want to make it. 
> 
> I’m sure our boys will and I hope they are or will be happy ever after!


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